fuck thousands for a coffin. or hundreds for an urn. can i legally be burried in butcher paper?
can i donate my body to science and skip burrial all together?
i want my final action to be a big middle finger to the funeral industry picking on people in their weakest moments.
There’s a book called “Stiff” by Mary Roach where she looks into all the various ways to (legally) dispose of your body.
You can donate it to scientific research (my personal preference) and they will use it as a very accurate crash test dummy (usually).
Things like the glass in car windows and car crumple zones were invented with the help of such donations, and she claims that on average 14 lives are saved by every body donated.
When I die just throw me in the trash
No lie, i want a sky burial. Your body is split open and left on a mountainside populated by vultures, after a few days the villagers return and collect your bones, the only thing left. They grind your bones and mix them into crackers, which are then spread around the fields for birds to eat. Your entire body goes back to the birds, i love it. My wife isn’t taking it seriously but I mean it, i want one of those
Live with cats. They will take care of it.
To praphrase Diogenes and Frank: Just throw me in the trash!
Do a viking funeral. You know, that ceremony where you are sent out in a boat and a fire arrow is fired into the boat so it burns down while floating into the sunset.
But skip the boat. Have someone chuck you into the ocean and shoot arrows at you until you sink.
I want to be launched into the ocean with a catapult
Have nothing of value left when you die and make sure your relatives refuse ownership of anything. Leave it as a problem for the state to deal with.
Have nothing of value left
Debt with scummy companies is much better.
Max out all your cards or tell your kids to do so. Buy stuff that is consumable so there are no assets to reclaim.
Donate everything still working and the rest goes to a medical school for practice.
Do that and your organs will get sold from the back of a van
Become entirely homeless and cut off all contacts and remove all identification so no one will be around to care when you die.
God that sounds so nice.
Well, in my mind it’s freezing to death on a side walk pressed against a wall trying to stay under the one unobstructed over hang.
Please, I can only get so erect.
Get eaten by a shark
Sky burial.
There are burial grounds that are basically natural parks, where you have to be buried in something biodegradable, like a shroud or pine needle basket, and no grave markers are allowed besides something like a tree or uncut rock. (Burial locations are recorded by gps.) I’d like to be buried in one of these places. Not sure what the cost is, though.
Don’t die. That’ll teach them.
That’s my plan. So far it’s working out!
You’ll get bored eventually.
Missing at sea could count
Science Vs. did a great episode on Human Composting a few years back. It’s really touching and highlights a fantastic way to convert your death into life.
Here is a link to the episode. https://open.spotify.com/episode/6reXXkhnvGxpSvnCz8wP2c
“It is every citizen’s final duty to go into the tanks and become one with all the people.”
Chairman Sheng-ji Yang, “Ethics for Tomorrow”
Is it a luxury option for the rich?
No. As far as I know, its the cheapest legal option. The only hurdle is that only like 10 states allow it as a legal option.
Donate to science?
