• Nikls94@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    7
    arrow-down
    15
    ·
    edit-2
    17 hours ago

    Wow that actually makes sense.

    But then again, I’m born 1994, there’s not so many I can actually date. I have like 1990 - 1998 available, and they must be an only child or have siblings within that age as well, otherwise the interests are not overlapping enough to spend time together: those younger are TikTok addicted, those older are Facebook-relicts. I’m in limbo where I know all of that but don’t like anything.

    Edit: to those who downvoted, why?

    • AtariDump@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      5
      ·
      9 hours ago

      …those younger are TikTok addicted, those older are Facebook-relicts.

      You’re being very assuming with people and that’s why the downvotes.

      Not every person will be “TikTok addicted” or “Facebook-relicts”, you’re just assuming they are which is only affecting your own chances finding someone.

      Try just getting to know someone first before you start assuming about their interests or what they do.

      … and they must be an only child or have siblings within that age as well, otherwise the interests are not overlapping enough to spend time together…

      Who says you have to spend time with your SO’s siblings for any great length of time? Parties and holidays you can get through, but it’s not like you’re going to go live with the family.

      You and your SO should both have your own friends and hobbies (in addition to joint friends/hobbies). I’m not trying to crap on having a relationship with your SO’s family, just that it’s not mandatory.

      I feel like removing these two arbitrary requirements would vastly increase your dating pool. I get that people are looking for traits in a potential partner (doesn’t smoke / drinks / poly / not-poly / uses Arch) but the ones you’ve picked are just self limiting

    • ɯᴉuoʇuɐ@lemmy.dbzer0.com
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      14
      ·
      14 hours ago

      to those who downvoted, why?

      Because of this part:

      they must be an only child or have siblings within that age as well, otherwise the interests are not overlapping enough to spend time together

    • ArcaneSlime@lemmy.dbzer0.com
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      3
      ·
      10 hours ago

      The clumsy portmanteau of facebook and derelicts if I had to guess. That one is just dreadful. Go with Facebougoise or something, The Faceborg maybe (I actually like that one), something like that.

    • abysmalpoptart@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      28
      ·
      edit-2
      6 hours ago

      Just for a little context, the minimum age being ((your age / 2)+7) is meant to be “this is the minimum age of someone you can date without it being creepy” (i believe it originated from the TV show how i met your mother)

      If you were born in 1994 you are either 30 or 31. Let’s call it 30 for easy math.

      30/2 = 15 15+7=22

      So anyone who is 22 or older fits the minimum age concept, which is anyone born in approx 2002/2003 or earlier. If you decided to include that, the extra 4-5 years does increase the dating pool quite a bit.

      I’m not telling you who to date, just giving a little context to the math since that’s what was brought up in the original comment.

      Edit: Lots of folks chiming in with some really good insight about the history of the math. Thank you all for that!

      Although the historical accounts seem to be math for the “ideal age” in a (probably female) partner and not “minimum age before it’s creepy” as it was presented in HIMYM, it’s really interesting to see how that equation has been used for over 100 years!

      • Denjin@feddit.uk
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        6
        ·
        11 hours ago

        No one knows the true origin of the idea but there’s a number of examples that predate how I met your mother by over a hundred years.

        The first published example is Max O’Rell in Her Royal Highness, Woman: And His Majesty—Cupid from 1901

        I heard the other day a very good piece of advice, which I should like to repeat here, as I endorse it thoroughly : A man should marry a woman half his age, plus seven. Try it at whatever age you like, and you will find it works very well, taking for granted all the while that, after all, a man as well as a woman is the age that he looks and feels.

      • Waraugh@lemmy.dbzer0.com
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        5
        ·
        11 hours ago

        It had to be a thing before how I met your mother, I remember it being a thing during school in the 80-90’s

        • abysmalpoptart@lemmy.world
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          1
          ·
          6 hours ago

          Totally fair, lots of folks have chimed in about it. Really interesting to see it’s over 100 years old (although more focused on ideal partner, not avoiding being creepy)

      • ikt@aussie.zone
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        22
        ·
        17 hours ago

        (i believe it originated from the TV show how i met your mother)

        Although the provenance of the rule is unclear, it is sometimes said to have originated in France.[81] The rule appears in John Fox Jr.'s 1903 novel The Little Shepherd of Kingdom Come,[84] in American newspapers in 1931 attributed to Maurice Chevalier,[85] and in The Autobiography of Malcolm X, attributed to Elijah Muhammad.[86]

        In many early sources, the rule was primarily presented as a formula to calculate the ideal age of a female partner at the beginning of a heterosexual relationship. Frederick Locker-Lampson’s Patchwork from 1879 states the opinion “A wife should be half the age of her husband with seven years added.”[87] Max O’Rell’s Her Royal Highness Woman from 1901 gives the rule in the format “A man should marry a woman half his age, plus seven.”[88]

        https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Age_disparity_in_sexual_relationships

      • zout@fedia.io
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        4
        ·
        14 hours ago

        Also, for the maximum age they are the younger one. So assuming age is 30, substract 7 and multiply the outcome by 2, maximum date age is 46…

      • AlolanYoda@mander.xyz
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        4
        ·
        14 hours ago

        Invert this rule to get the maximum age you can date (defined as the person whose minimum age is your current age):

        min age = (your age / 2) + 7 max age = (your age * 2) - 14

        If you’re 30, then you can reasonably date people between 22 and 46. So the other guy can add even more years before 1990.