4chan loves stories where women are cheaters or vile, I’m gonna say I doubt this happened
Believe it or not, 100% of cheaters who birthed a child were women.
Idk about that. Recently heard a story about someone how wasn’t woman and is going to give birth here real soon. A real asshole kind of guy, ostensibly.
All I got was a really detailed set of pictures, though.
Wait, what? People would just make up stories on the internet?
hey slow down there partner; you can’t just go typing out questions like that out here.
Sometimes the 4chan kids can come up with some genuinely funny bits. Shame they couldn’t turn a legit setup into something better than “Dad An Hero”.
Where’d the “an hero” for
Tap for spoiler
suicide
even come from?
https://knowyourmeme.com/memes/an-hero
He was such an hero, to take it all away. We miss him so, That you should know, And we honor him this day. He was an hero, to take that shot, to leave us all behind.
It was 2006: typos made by grieving people had a chance to become memes.
isn’t “an hero” technically correct? It sounds weird, but it is not grammatically wrong.
What do you mean “not grammatically wrong” ?
“An” is used before words that start with a vowel sound.
An orange. A cop. An easter egg. A yeast overgrowth. An hour. A hero. etc.
Ok thank God, I thought I was going crazy for a second. This is the rule I follow and I had a moment where I thought maybe I’d been wrong my entire life. Should be more confident.
Not unless you’re Dick Van Dyke doing cockney, it’s not.
Depends whether you pronounce the H or not. If the way you say it doesn’t differentiate between hero and 'ero then you could use ‘an’ but it’ll appear wrong to others who do pronounce a difference between the two.
I concur and posit that anon is a homosexual
yhea, maybe it’s the dad that cheated and is upset he was found out by the DNA test
They love those stories but it unfortunately happens a lot too
Basically a lot of women cheat… and similarly a lot of men cheat. I have no numbers, but I know women usually say all men are cheaters and men usually say all women are cheaters so I’m guessing both genders cheat way too much. But if a woman cheats and has a baby, that baby always becomes part of the family. If a man cheats and has a baby… Either it comes out immediately when the woman in question asks for child support or tells the man’s wife/girlfriend, or it doesn’t really come out because that woman is also in a relationship and wants to pass the child off as her man’s. Plus even if 10 years down the line the woman comes out and says “hey you remember that time you cheated on your wife? Well I’d like you to meet our child”, that’s a lot less personal than raising someone else’s kid as your own and then finding out 10, 20 or maybe 40 years later.
Reminds me I should get a DNA test done while my kid’s age is still single digits. I’m hoping no surprises despite my slut of an ex having been with what I’m guessing may be dozens of other dudes in the <2 years we were together. The whole “pill baby” was so perfectly planned though, that I’m pretty sure she took a break from whoring until she was pregnant. In fact it’s what she did with her first kid’s father - quick break from whoring when she found a nice target, boom, pregnant, and then she was free to sleep with everyone again while he was at work. He ended up paying one of her regulars to take photos of her snaps with a second phone just so he could finally have proof.
But yeah, people on 4chan and many subreddits love women cheating stories. Anything to hate women. I try not to be a misogynist, but having gone through what I’ve gone through it’s super easy to automatically believe cheating stories of all kinds. But to be fair I believe them automatically whether the cheater is a man or a woman, that doesn’t matter to me. I just hate humans.
Edit: To be clear, no I don’t hate women, nor do I think it’s common for women to have babies on purpose, particularly while cheating. It was a connection I made in my mind from “that’s something that can happen to people” to “shit, my ex is the kinda person who’d do this on purpose”. My main point, before my personal anecdote, was that people cheat and sometimes pregnancy happens, but if it’s the woman that did the cheating, the pregnancy, if kept, becomes part of the family and it can be traumatic to find out later that you’ve been raising someone else’s child - while if a man does the cheating, the child is often someone else’s problem entirely and even if it does come out eventually, it’s seen as a lesser thing, and men get cut more slack in general when it comes to these things.
Uhhhh, hold on a second.
But if a woman cheats and has a baby, that baby always becomes part of the family. If a man cheats and has a baby… Either it comes out immediately when the woman in question asks for child support or tells the man’s wife/girlfriend, or it doesn’t really come out because that woman is also in a relationship and wants to pass the child off as her man’s. Plus even if 10 years down the line the woman comes out and says “hey you remember that time you cheated on your wife? Well I’d like you to meet our child”, that’s a lot less personal than raising someone else’s kid as your own and then finding out 10, 20 or maybe 40 years later.
What?
I’m hoping no surprises despite my slut of an ex having been with what I’m guessing may be dozens of other dudes in the <2 years we were together. The whole “pill baby” was so perfectly planned though, that I’m pretty sure she took a break from whoring until she was pregnant. In fact it’s what she did with her first kid’s father - quick break from whoring when she found a nice target, boom, pregnant, and then she was free to sleep with everyone again while he was at work.
There is a ton to unpack here that I’m afraid I simply do not have the strength for. What I can say is that your perspective is skewed.
People cheat for a variety of reasons. Yes, someone doing something like what you were a victim of is 100% an unforgiveable crime. Your life, your childs life, and the lives of anyone else that has to tolerate someone like that, have been permanently marked by her machinations.
That being said, people also cheat because they’re horny impulsive idiots that seem to think STDs don’t exist, let alone the biggest STD of them all : pregnancy (I’m kidding, childbirth is a beautiful thing — typically).
Not everyone is a criminal mastermind nymphomaniac roping unsuspecting men into… whatever the fuck her goal was. Seriously, you can’t let yourself think like that.
Okay, I’ll unpack a bit. It’s clear that some things I said can be taken the wrong way and perhaps it’s not clear what was me making general statements about what seems to happen in people’s heads in some scenarios vs what was my personal anecdote and such. This happens a lot, I have ADHD and sometimes seemingly obvious leaps between different points are not very obvious to others.
But if a woman cheats and has a baby, that baby always becomes part of the family. If a man cheats and has a baby… Either it comes out immediately when the woman in question asks for child support or tells the man’s wife/girlfriend, or it doesn’t really come out because that woman is also in a relationship and wants to pass the child off as her man’s. Plus even if 10 years down the line the woman comes out and says “hey you remember that time you cheated on your wife? Well I’d like you to meet our child”, that’s a lot less personal than raising someone else’s kid as your own and then finding out 10, 20 or maybe 40 years later.
What?
This I meant as to why there are more stories of women cheating and getting caught a long time after the fact (besides the obvious gender bias and double standards where women are just held to a higher standard when family and relationship stuff is concerned). It can just come out in a DNA test of your own child that you’ve been raising for decades. No, I personally have not experienced this. I didn’t mean to insinuate that women cheat on purpose or that women cheating is worse than men cheating. Just that raising someone else’s child as your own can be very traumatic to find out decades later and this is more likely to happen when women cheat, because… well… by the miracle of childbirth we always know exactly who the baby’s mom is, but not who the dad is. And if a man cheats and it comes out decades later when the kid reaches out, for an example, the man is often forgiven - both because we tend to hold men to lesser standards regarding relationships and because the child that was conceived wasn’t raised by the woman that was cheated on, so it might feel a bit less personal and traumatic. It’s an event that happened long ago vs something you’ve been living with the entire time.
I’m hoping no surprises despite my slut of an ex having been with what I’m guessing may be dozens of other dudes in the <2 years we were together. The whole “pill baby” was so perfectly planned though, that I’m pretty sure she took a break from whoring until she was pregnant. In fact it’s what she did with her first kid’s father - quick break from whoring when she found a nice target, boom, pregnant, and then she was free to sleep with everyone again while he was at work.
There is a ton to unpack here that I’m afraid I simply do not have the strength for. What I can say is that your perspective is skewed.
This part is my personal anecdote. It wasn’t meant to insinuate that this is common at all. It doesn’t even change how I view women in general, it only makes me very careful about sex and relationships in the future. This is one very special woman, in that when she finally goes to hell, the devil’s out of a job - and I’m not even religious. Allow me to elaborate. I’m the second victim and the first victim’s story is similar to mine. In both cases, she got pregnant very early in a relationship (in my case after she found out I was having doubts about having a relationship with her in the first place, because to me it was just a fling at first, but I was stupid and believed her when she said she was on the pill. I’m a fucking idiot). Look, I’ll skip most of the trauma dump. She was violent towards me, always threatened suicide, yada yada, boring. Put me at least 70k EUR in debt, spent my dad’s inheritance, and we had nothing to show for it. At peak I made so much money on a monthly basis that I could’ve had 3 mortgages and 2 car payments and still feed the family and go on vacations - except instead it all went to her shit and consumer loans for shit that had no real value. She never worked a single day in the time we were in a relationship, she immediately took sick leave after we met and then quit her job a bit later. At peak I worked 250 hours a month AND took care of the children most of the time. This means that for like half a year I got 2-3 hours of sleep per night and she kept telling me I wasn’t helping with the children enough, I wasn’t working enough, I was always sleeping, while SHE was sleeping 12 hours a day and the rest of the time she was usually out (like I said, whoring). In less than 2 years, we had over 50 strollers. 6 or 7 cars. She had me buy 15 winter jackets during her pregnancy. Now the bitch is trying to get me to pay child support, so she kidnapped our toddler and immediately demanded money - while I’d been raising said child alone for 4 months and GIVING HER money instead of asking for child support that I was literally entitled to. Well I got my child back and things are fine now, except she’s threatening me with court twice a day (without ever actually suing me because she has no money and she knows she’d lose if she did, because I haven’t done anything wrong). Oh, and the cheating I mentioned earlier? She doesn’t even do it because of horny. She literally does it because she enjoys being in control, having more freedom than her partner. That’s also why she accuses every single partner of hers of cheating, while she’s cheated on every single partner she’s had.
So my case for thinking I should get a DNA test done is to see if all this has at least been for my own child. Because after the shit I’ve personally gone through, after I’ve wasted a quarter million and almost ruined all my friendships over 2 years because of someone who never actually even LIKED me, I’d like to know the reason I endured all this instead of telling her to fuck off was at least really for my own child, not someone else’s. Yes, I’m selfish like that. What will I do if I find out it’s not mine? Probably nothing, because I can’t ruin an innocent young life by sentencing them to live with someone who actually thinks hitting a 3 year old with a belt for not eating is reasonable. But if she ever manages to get custody somehow, I’ll at least know I can dodge child support, which is the only thing she’s actually after.
But I do not think this is common. The “have a child to keep a man” crowd can’t be very big because it’s not a very successful strategy. And literally every woman I know that isn’t retired has a job, I literally don’t know anyone else coasting by on an indentured man like that. Besides my ex of course. But she’s not getting hit by a karma freight train, she’s getting hit by a karma oil tanker really soon.
That being said, people also cheat because they’re horny impulsive idiots that seem to think STDs don’t exist, let alone the biggest STD of them all : pregnancy (I’m kidding, childbirth is a beautiful thing — typically).
Yes, I agree, this is the actual more common reason for cheating. That, or the relationship being dead already. In the above described relationship, I came real close to cheating at one point. Like “if we’d had some time alone, it would’ve happened” close, with a mutual friend who also despised her by then - my ex abused her too. It didn’t happen so I can still proudly say I’ve never cheated on anyone in my life, but I can see how an unhealthy relationship can drive someone to cheat too.
And I mean, I am still happy to be a father. My child’s amazing. I’ve never felt such love from anyone except perhaps my own mother. But I’ll never be able to explain why mommy and daddy really aren’t together, or why daddy’s fighting so hard to keep mommy away. I’ll have to lie, because nobody should ever find out that this shit was how and why they were born.
Not everyone is a criminal mastermind nymphomaniac roping unsuspecting men into… whatever the fuck her goal was.
Literally money. I drove a nice car when we met, I had a well-paid job where I could slack off a bit while working at home and she liked that I had both money AND time to give her the attention she wanted. Her other baby daddy similarly is very hard working and was well-off financially, though he worked a very different type of job, with strict schedules and such. Makes for very easy cheating of course.
Seriously, you can’t let yourself think like that.
Eh, look, I don’t. This anecdote wasn’t meant to convey that I think cheating women get pregnant on purpose. My ex did, twice, but she’s a special kind of evil. It was more of a “this is a thing that can happen … I should check if my child is actually my own, because if anyone’s likely to knowingly hide a child’s true parentage, it’s my ex” jump to a related topic because, again, I have ADHD and make weird connections in my head and sometimes the leaps I make aren’t clear and I also don’t describe them clearly enough.
I am actually still hoping to find “the one”. By which I mean a sane person I have interests in common with that actually likes me not my ability to make money appear out of thin air when the need is dire, and is willing to stay employed when in a relationship. After all this fuckery, I do still think there’s someone out there for me to enjoy the rest of my life with. It’s because I’m lucky enough to have awesome female friends. If I didn’t have any, I’d probably be an extreme misogynist by now.
In the words of 4chan “fake and gay”
gay: anon had a (presumably) loving relationship with a man who was not his dad
Story probably fake, but this would be one of those moment where you keep that info to yourself or go to the mom. And for all intents and purposes he is still his father just not bio but who cares, it’s the one that raised you that matters
Yeah - the father has already been taken advantage of and lied to once, so it’s probably best to just double down and do it again. It’s not like it matters whether he would want to know or anything.
I guess the point is that it matters to the father since he hasn’t had a biological son and is likely too old to do so now, even if it doesn’t matter to anon.
Which is fucked up. Being the sperm donor isn’t what makes you a father. Spending time with your kid, teaching them how to be a functional human in the modern world over decades is what makes you a father
Then again, with how much of the older generation men are, he may have acted like his role was finished after conception and the next two decades are the sole responsibility of the mother
Being the sperm donor isn’t what makes you a father. Spending time with your kid, teaching them how to be a functional human in the modern world over decades is what makes you a father
As a stepdad myself, I can personally attest to that fact. I met my boys when they were little, at only 4 years old and 5 months old. For all intents and purposes, they are my boys.
Their own bio dad is hardly present and only does the bare minimum when it’s his parenting time. It’s hard. Bio dad got remarried (briefly), but my wife and I ended up having to break the news to the boys that their new stepmom and stepbrothers were going away (because bio dad is a piece of shit and screamed at his new wife over the fact that there were mushrooms in his food). I watched my son’s heart get ripped in half; all I could do was hold him as he sobbed into my arms.
But, also, it could mean that the mom knew, and lied to son and dad, for son’s whole life, and most of mom and dad’s relationship.
If you know you’re a stepdad, that’s entirely different than not knowing you are actually a step dad.
Of course, this particular case doesn’t have much details, so this is a basically a hypothetical… but tons of guys feel betrayed when they learn their wife/gf has been lying to them, had been cheating on them, etc.
Sure, it could be that this older guy was going off of ‘I have failed to reproduce my genetic line’ logic, but I’d bet the actual emotions he felt were massive betrayal from the mom, like she’d been tricking him for half his life, probably felt like he betrayed and failed his son by not being honest with his son, despite that not being his fault.
Of course, offing yourself does not make you a better father, but uh, exceptionally emotionally devastated people do sometimes make rash, permanent, illogical decisions.
It’s people like you and some below that give me faith in human beings, still. Thank you!
this would be one of those moment where you keep that info to yourself
Okay, but then you wouldn’t get updoots on the intertube.
I have a half-sibling who took one of those tests not knowing his parents went to a sperm bank due to fertility issues, so he assumed his mom had an affair (and he’s not the youngest child). The rest of us all knew I think (except the sperm donor’s actual child). Fortunately, he had another one of my half-siblings reach out to him to explain it.
Also “Turned out my father isn’t my real dad” is BS. Genetic test results are useless for determining such.
Genetic tests can be used to determine paternity though?
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/DNA_paternity_testing
Maybe you are referring to a specific type of test?
He’s referring to the fact that paternity doesn’t make you a dad.
You can preach this too.
Eh we all know what anon meant
Yes, we all get anon was also communicating that his dad didn’t contribute ~half of anon’s genetic material, but using language that also communicates that real parents should be devalued if they don’t contribute their seed and seed donors should be thought of as being more than just irrelevant seed donors.
I mean they’re the biological father
That’s not what anon said though.
No I meant to your irrelevant seed donor thing
Who is your father, the one you would rely on when you need a paternal figure, the dude who shoot his sperm or the dude who raised you? Hopefully both dudes are the same person but in the case they aren’t, I think the answer is clear.
I’d be surprised if adopted kids don’t consider the people who raised them as parents as their actual parents.
I mean first one might just be a father figure, second is the biological father and the third might be a step-father. All fathers of sort
You would be technically correct with the first two even though I was talking in social terms,not technical ones, but adopted kids are not step-kids. Those aren’t are legally full parents, not step-parents. Step-parents might be the boyfriend or next husband of a single mother or vice-versa, but once you are adopted, if we are getting pedantic about it, the step thing disappears.
Oh okay, i just thought it came from not being the biological father
Those tests are how we know who our formerly anonymous sperm donor is and how a bunch of us half-siblings know each other. We’ve met the sperm donor a couple times. Seems like a cool dude mostly. But he’s only one person’s real dad.
Also “Turned out my father isn’t my real dad” is BS. Genetic test results are useless for determining such.
Wait, what now? The AncestryDNA test isn’t WGS, but it analyzes 700K loci. One can infer relatedness with an insanely high degree of accuracy with that number. For reference, the standard US paternity test uses 20 loci and it’s more than 99% accurate.
Or do you mean one needn’t be a biological parent to be a real father to a child? I agree with that 100%.
Or do you mean one needn’t be a biological parent to be a real father to a child?
Correct!
Also “Turned out my father isn’t my real dad” is BS. Genetic test results are useless for determining such.
I’m so confused by this. Are you playing semantic games here? Because this is otherwise completely wrong, and contradicts the story you told before it
contradicts the story you told before it
At least you recognized that I clearly didn’t think that ancestryDNA tests couldn’t determine paternity. But it just determines who provided sperm (or an egg and womb), not who the real parents are.
Your real dad is the father who raised you. Don’t discriminate against step-parents.
Ancestrydna isn’t a paternity test
AncestryDNA would absolutely give conclusive proof of either close blood relationship or lack thereof. In practice, it’s just as good as a paternity test.
The only caveats I can think of are:
- Both parent and (potential) child would have to get the test.
- I guess if AncestryDNA just completely messed up and represented some random other person’s DNA as the parent’s or child’s, that would give false negatives.
- Chimerism.
- AncestryDNA might not be admissable in court.
And of those, the first three are just as applicable to paternity tests as they are to AncestryDNA.
I actually missed the part where anon said they got the test for them and their parents.
If the bio dad also did the test then Ancestry will match it with this kid. And even if the bio dad isn’t on there if you find out via the tests that you have close relatives like first cousins, uncles, aunts that you never knew you had, you can put two and two together and come to the same conclusion.
Yikes
TMDNWU Lemmy!
I doubt this even happened. A dad that raised this kid would most likely not off himself because the mother lied, this seems like I might be the dark fantasy of a typical 4channer
I mean he had been cuckolded to raise another man’s child, and that being his only child too, even a fairly open minded person would struggle with such a revelation
And if I ever learned something like that I’d take that shit to my grave.
Of course I’ve also learned I have a sister no one knew about because my dad was swinger in college so
And if I ever learned something like that I’d take that shit to my grave.
Like I don’t think you have to. Valid reason to leave the wife or whatever. But even then this father still has a kid, biological or not. I believe most would not change their relationship to the kid.
Lol i would leave immediately
