if i’m way off base or this seems ableist let me know
I think you’re good, though I think it also depends a lot on what “the old Matt” means, since yeah he’s different now, but it seems possible (especially hearing his poetry and about his book) that much of his actual personality, though it might have been changed by the trauma and hardship he’s experienced, was not destroyed by the stroke. It comes across very differently because his tools for communicating were absolutely fucked, but a lot of what’s actually in there in terms of who he is seems to have survived. Not that I knew him or know him, of course.
But if you mean not “Matt” the human but “Matt” the podcast persona, then I agree that that’s probably mostly gone because it was so defined by his idiosyncratic communication style, his speed, his range of expression, and so on. It’s super parasocial of me, but I’m mostly just glad that Matt the human seems to have held on to himself despite what he went through.
yeah i meant the podcast persona. i know he’s still there, thats why i used the hallucinogen analogy.
he’s the same person just in a new, altered state of consciousness that he has to adapt to
but the only personality change i’ve seen is has kind of accepted his own helplessness, sort of jokerfied, but this is absolutely understandable as traumatic response not brain injury
relearn how to use language, relearn what constitutes being an individual being is, relearn the concept of self - but all accelerated and time dilated at the same time
the mere thought of going through that again is exhausting me
I think you’re good, though I think it also depends a lot on what “the old Matt” means, since yeah he’s different now, but it seems possible (especially hearing his poetry and about his book) that much of his actual personality, though it might have been changed by the trauma and hardship he’s experienced, was not destroyed by the stroke. It comes across very differently because his tools for communicating were absolutely fucked, but a lot of what’s actually in there in terms of who he is seems to have survived. Not that I knew him or know him, of course.
But if you mean not “Matt” the human but “Matt” the podcast persona, then I agree that that’s probably mostly gone because it was so defined by his idiosyncratic communication style, his speed, his range of expression, and so on. It’s super parasocial of me, but I’m mostly just glad that Matt the human seems to have held on to himself despite what he went through.
yeah i meant the podcast persona. i know he’s still there, thats why i used the hallucinogen analogy.
he’s the same person just in a new, altered state of consciousness that he has to adapt to
but the only personality change i’ve seen is has kind of accepted his own helplessness, sort of jokerfied, but this is absolutely understandable as traumatic response not brain injury
As someone who has more than a few times eaten an irresponsible amount of mushrooms I agree with that analogy.
lol yes. both that and LSD for me.
relearn how to use language, relearn what constitutes being an individual being is, relearn the concept of self - but all accelerated and time dilated at the same time
the mere thought of going through that again is exhausting me
Think I might get some tomorrow now actually
good luck! enjoy the brain zone