It sounds like your friends aren’t jerks, so that’s something. Can ask them more directly for help? If they know what you do and don’t want out of the game, maybe they they’ll be able to recommend a deck that’s more likely to deliver it. One idea, if you have the time for it, is to play some practice games open-handed, where you all talk about why you’re doing what you’re doing.
Getting the board wiped is normal in Magic and especially in Commander. Try to learn to prepare for it. If you have a couple of blockers and don’t feel like you’re in immediate danger of dying, try keeping some of your cards in hand to rebuild after it happens. (I’m not saying it’s easy to strike the right balance; I’m still not good at it.)
Honestly, Commander isn’t my favorite format, and I think you’ve correctly identified some of the problems with it. What @ptc075 said earlier about playing the social game is accurate. That’s why I like to recommend “Group Hug”-type decks. Even if you’re not necessarily winning the game, making your resources valuable to other players helps ensure that at least you’re participating in it.
Well, “Prison” is an established archetype, focused on strategies that make it hard for opponents to assemble a board presence. It’s true that some people won’t find it fun. But if your playgroup is competitive, it might be in line with what they expect.