I got home from work last night and was hooting a toot outside when I heard a noise from by the shed. It freaked me out because I know there are skunks in this area and I wasn’t keen on getting spayed for the first time in my life. As I turned to go back inside, my neighbour’s side door light came on and I saw a raccoon in the alleyway. I got out my phone to take a picture and then another one showed up. As soon as they saw me they turned to leave. That’s when I said “No, don’t go. I’m not a snitch, I’m not gonna tell anybody.”

They. Came. Back.

As they tore through my neighbour’s garbage I said “Yes, friends. Eat trash. Be free.”