Never been a thing between me and my parents. I’m sure they want me to be in a happy relationship, but they’ve never pressured me. I assume those that do are influenced by social norms or some such peer pressure.
Because he’s 4 and has been rioting all day long
My parents don’t give a shit about anything i do. Just wanna know when am i gonna get married and have kids. Its sad
At essence it’s not worrying about you because you have a stable life. And sometimes because they want grandkids.
They probably want their kids to have someone to look after them when they are no longer around.
Everyone’s saying so the parents don’t have to worry, but there’s also an evolutionary / natural selection aspect to it. Those that ensure their kids had kids are more likely to successfully ensure their genes are passed on than those that don’t. Also, grandparents can help alleviate the burden of raising a child and allow parents to make even more kids
“Settlings Down” can mean different things.
It could mean:
- get married, have babies, keep a job for 10 years.
- stop getting drunk every night. Stop sleeping with random strangers. Keep a job long enough to pay me the $200 you owe me. Stop calling me at 3 AM to bail you out.
I think the first is often used as a polite way to say the second.
They’ll not going to be around forever so they want to know you’ll be able to look after yourself.
And a grandkid or two would be nice…
Some Inheritance would be nice, but my boomer dad insists on spending it himself. Neither of us get what we want.
That selfish bastard! Using the money he earned himself on him! Fucking boomer
…I get your point though (I think?), just not very obvious.
And I want to save money by not having kids. 🤨
It’s fair in a sense that his father may have left him inheritance
It’s his money, not yours
Yeah, and what if I choose not to have kids to save my money?
It’s my money, not his.
You’re not obligated to have children - just like your dad isn’t obligated to leave you an inheritance.
Exactly.
So why are my boomer parents so insistent about grandkids?
It’s expensive enough for just 2 of us to live. Why bring a 3rd into the situation?
The discussion wasn’t about them being insistent on grandkids - it was about you being insistent on inheritance. If you think they’re being unreasonable, then it’s worth recognizing that your own insistence might be just as unreasonable.
This reeks of privilege, dawg. Check yourself.
The boomers made their way, then pulled the ladder up behind them. That’s privilege.
For the overwhelming majority of the US population the notion of an ‘inheritance’ has not nor will it ever cross their mind.
Be bitter about the lack of social safety nets or any investments by those in power into the poor and middle class.
Not because you aren’t getting something from a loved one you somehow believe you were owed.
Oh, I hate this country with a passion.
Dad just wastes his money on dumb shit. He’s like a teenager in a 65 year old body.
He never spent as much on us growing up as he does and always has on himself.
I’ll be sure to find the seediest nursing home I can when he can’t afford to live on his own anymore.
Imho, it’ partly because then they know their kids have reached that stage in their lives where they are stable and have a home as well as are socially cared for and care for their significant other. Puts their minds at ease basically and they can age peacefully. Most parents basically want the best for their children and this is one symptom of it (now I’m prepared to get the replies of all the people with shitty parents.)
Yeah, this fits more or less where I am. My eldest is 27 and left home 5 years ago. He’s just out of a long term relationship around 6 months. He lives in a different country in central Europe and is living the life. Travels a lot, has a great group of friends spread all over the continent, great job that he really likes earning good money etc. I’m really happy for him and it does give me a sense of ease to see him at a point in his life where he’s thriving.
On the other hand I’d be very happy to see him in a loving relationship and / or owning property instead of paying rent. Snuggles are nice and rent is poverty tax (for the most part) but I’m conscious that owning a property ties him to a place and he’s not ready for that yet.
So…to answer OP…I’m not obsessed with it at all, but they’re nice things to see for your kids that kinda tick the box of “my job here is (mostly) done”.
Probably they see their kids as an investment and want to see dividends in the form of A, grandchildren and/or B, financial support in their old age. In that regard it’s inherently selfish. At least justifiably so, but still.
Or maybe they just want their kids to have a successful life? (in the traditional sense)
Because to them settling down means having “made it”. It’s the last checkpoint before you stop being their baby boy/girl and become a full-fledged adult.
So you don’t have to worry so much anymore.
100 thousand years of biological drive and evolution? Add on culture and religious drive to reproduce.
One of the earliest ways religions attempted (and still do) become the dominant religion was simply out breeding the other ones.
Because it’s at that point that we’ve “beat the game”.
Lifescript.exe
