I DM’d a group that tried to optimize every situation, and every turn off combat. That’s okay as long as it stays fun, but once they start spinning their wheels, or one player turns combat into a slog, then I take measures.

In my experience (and from what I’ve heard of other groups) optimisers are rarely the cause of this problem, usually it’s the more casual or inexperienced players.

How much damage did she take from the poison?

made the poison, then promptly drank it to sacrifice it

That sounds, uh, inadvisable.

like is there a single thing she hasn’t already done and excelled at

Having self-confidence

Talking to Razira without turning into a flustered mess

Saying rude words

is bardlock a mix of bard and warlock?

Yes

why is everything a warlock in dnd?

It multiclasses well, two levels for agonising repelling blast, plus a subclass feature, and then you can pick any charisma caster.

I once unleashed an ancient evil on the world in a failed attempt to open an unlocked door.

If it’s this dangerous there’s sure to be great loot at the end.

Impeccable logic

They’ve got accusations coming out the wazoo

This reminds me of a comic I saw a while ago where the BBEG was gloating that he could only be killed by the sword next to him that couldn’t be pulled from the stone. The barbarian picks up the BBEG and swings him at the sword.

You know you’ve made it as a social network when you get your first porn spambot.

Total coincidence they picked someone Jewish for their conspiracies about bankers secretly controlling the world.

None of these folks are capable of manufacturing modern nitrocellulose gun powder or primer caps necessary to reload their fancy rifles and handguns.

This gave me a thought, would having equipment for ammonia and other chemicals (for fertiliser as well as explosives) be useful for preppers?

That can be delayed for a long time by stockpiling spare parts.

Also, she’s immune to all poisons.

How did she get that?

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It’s been well reported on that Russia doesn’t work like that, with junior officers unable to use initiative and the whole system being very slow to respond to changing events. The reason it operates like this was shown when they did try having a more independent unit, which resulted in the Wagner Group mutinying.

That’s standard in Western militaries. It means units aren’t paralyzed by unexpected circumstances while they wait for communication to go up and down the chain of command, and it improves resilience if communications or senior officers are incapacitated.

The electoral college exists to give slave states more votes.