My mom is 78 and she has been guilt tripping me to be her care taker. She is currently living with my brother to help raising his kids.
She constantly tells me once they are old enough, she will move in with me so that I can take care of her.
The thing is I don’t know if I am capable. I can’t guarantee the future.
I also don’t want to shoulder the financial burden. She has money but she wants me to pay for her expenses so that she can leave (my brother’s) a generous inheritance. She always tellsd me I won’t get anything since 'i have no kids and I have enough money, and he needs more."
Now we are not talking. It hurts. Why can’t she understand not everyone can be a caretaker? Why is she expecting me to help raising his kids indirectly?
Not having kids is just as much a life choice as not letting her move in. She will have to respect that. Her attitude is further reason to not let her move in. She sounds horrible. Why rely on you, if she has money or even more money to give away? This is a horrific power game you can only lose if you give in. I guess she is someone who never had to deal with the consequences of behaving like an asshole. Time to show her that respect has to be earned. And she lost hers for you, if she ever had any.