Hello to my friends from Lemmy, the title may be misleading to some.
Long story short, I was in a relationship for a bit over 2 years and I broke up with her recently. I blocked her everywhere, and initially struggled with not thinking about her and our relationship all the time, but now I find it hard to think. Although I have coped and detached very well, it seems that I have nothing to think of, and if I’m not spending my time on entertainment or studying (e.g. in the car) I resort to thinking about my relationship again. It’s been making me really unproductive and I’m not even sure what I was like when I was single.
It’s not that I am obsessed with “her” or feeling anything, but I can’t focus on nothing - it seems that my mental resources keep running and forcing me to concentrate on something. But I don’t want to think of “her” again. The past few days I often thought of “her” sexually romantically or as physically present, but now I often stress about the relationship itself and question all the decisions I may have made in the relationship. I mean I’ve considered actions and things that happened in my relationship in a productive way but I keep on going back to thinking of those things again (which isn’t helpful at all).
Does anyone have advice on how I can sit and focus productively or even neutrally, instead of trying to rethink and overthink a relationship that I’ve already thought of.
Edit: if you want further info about the relationship itself, https://lemmy.world/post/727078
That first paragraph was a great explanation. Thank you for that perspective there.
It’s kind of weird that first relationships rarely do work out. It’s only the third day now so maybe I should let time do its thing. This will only make me stronger but this does make me afraid of having a relationship in the future! Will not touch any drugs, thanks.
Hey mate, just going through my account and thought id check in
It’s been so long man. But damn I had to struggle, and I am at a better place now. Still a student, but I have grown a lot. Bless you for helping me at a vulnerable time. It still hurts sometime, but I know I have made a lot of progress in positive things.
Great to hear from you - haven’t forgotten and good to know you’re kicking ass. People forget that growing is painful, if it wasn’t we would have already done it.
Keep at it mate, remember me at your wedding because you’re going to get there.