I cannot keep my job. Firstly because I’m on FMLA (unpaid medical leave) for a mystery illness and I cannot guarantee that, even if finally diagnosed, I will be recovered by the 12 week maximum allotted.
Secondly because we’ve put our daughter in online school due to severe bullying. The program she’s in now is awful and I have to help her through her English lessons (she’s in 7th grade and they’re having her read 18th century texts). We’re switching her to a new program next semester which requires a parent to be a full-time “learning coach” for their kid to keep them on track.
It’s a terrible job. I absolutely hate it. The pay is low, the job is boring, my co-workers don’t really care about my existence, and my bosses are friendly but unreasonable. The only thing I like is that I have a hybrid schedule where I can work from home for 18 hours a week. But spending the other 22 hours in the office sucks. I spend the whole time wearing noise-cancelling headphones just to get through the time there. I’ve wanted to leave this job for a good year now although I admit I wasn’t trying very hard to find another one.
But I just can’t bring myself to resign. I don’t know why. Something is stopping me like it’s the wrong thing to do. I know I will be happier even though we will be on a single income, I am doing the right thing for my daughter, and I have no idea when this medical issue will be resolved.
I was going to write the resignation letter last Friday. Every day I mean to write it and every day I just can’t do it. I know I have to do it soon. Maybe even today. But something won’t let me do it. My brain is telling me I can’t quit.
Thanks for reading my rant. I don’t know why I wrote it. I guess I needed to let it out to someone other than my wife and my boss follows me on non-anonymous social media so I can’t really talk about it there.
EDIT: I wrote the email, showed it to my wife to see what she thought and sent it. Now all I have to do is sit back and wait for a reply, but I’m shaking.
Ahhhh there’s the thing. That falls into my whole “keep personal and work separate.” I don’t make anything social media known to work, specifically because of things like that.
I didn’t want her to. She sent me a request and I didn’t know what to do, so I said yes. I wouldn’t have done it had I thought harder about it.
Is it just a work relationship, or do you socialize together outside of work? If it’s the former, just remove/block her once you are no longer employed.
If it’s the latter, then your resignation letter isn’t the place for it anyway.
It’s the former, but I don’t know if blocking them is a good idea if I want them to say good things about me to a possible future employer.
If you work for a large employer in the US, they probably won’t say anything useful, regardless. Most large companies (in the US) have a strict policy on references where they can only say things that are 100% true and provable in court. In practice, this means dates of employment, and possibly eligibility for rehire.
There are 2 main reasons for this. The first is liability. The second is that there is simply no incentive for them to say anything more. Even if you were terrible, that’s the potential new employer’s problem. If you don’t live in the US, or you work at a smaller employer, adjust accordingly.
But regardless, cleaning up your contact list when leaving won’t be seen as an insult. It’s the same as cleaning out your desk. Depending on which social network, you can also probably unfriend instead of block, and she can unfollow. If you want to keep her a professional reference, that social media connection is the wrong place to maintain that anyway.
It’s a small company. About 30 employees. So that is definitely something I would have to adjust for. However, I have written the email and I just have to bring up the courage to hit send.