• REDACTED@infosec.pub
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    1 day ago

    Look in the mirror and ask yourself why a woman might want you. You know you got flaws. What can you fix? Start fixing those things. Baby steps. Can you polish up your teeth? Lose some fat or gain some tone? Better haircut? Dress nicer? Got any interesting hobbies? And your interests don’t have to be attractive. Having a passion is interesting in itself.

    Uhh, the problem with dating men are the things you can’t see. Pretty much majority of men are capable of violence, have tendencies towards cheating, toxicity (or just mansculinity), men who make first good impression due to naturally hitting it off and humor, but later you realize he sees women as sex toys, ectera ectera.

    Insert nice guy meme here

    • boonhet@sopuli.xyz
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      1 day ago

      Just because we’re capable of violence (i.e stronger) doesn’t mean we are violent. I’ve had exes attack me at random, never did I do anything to defend myself except maybe try to hold them still. Now if another man attacked me, I wouldn’t hesitate. But never have I as an adult attacked another person. It’s a fucked up thing to do, it’s so easy to accidentally disable another person for life.

      Likewise, I’ve never cheated, but I’ve been cheated on plenty. So maybe it’s not a men vs women thing but rather a shitty people thing?

      Plus if we’re talking about men seeing women as sex toys, let’s talk women seeing men as walking wallets or maybe let’s just stop stereotyping people based on gender because otherwise we’ll just sow more hate between the genders.

      • REDACTED@infosec.pub
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        1 day ago

        When I said being capable of violence in the context of dating women, obviously I meant being capable of violence against women.

        Plus if we’re talking about men seeing women as sex toys, let’s talk women seeing men as walking wallets or maybe let’s just stop stereotyping people based on gender because otherwise we’ll just sow more hate between the genders.

        I’m just continuing the discussion. I’m sorry if speaking about men’s red flags/dealbreakers makes you uncomfortable, but I constantly hear about women’s red flags/dealbreakers, but it isn’t usually followed by “maybe we should not talk bad about other genders”

    • squaresinger@lemmy.world
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      1 day ago

      If you keep getting into relationships with crappy people, that it might not be because everyone is crappy, but because that’s what you subconsciously look for.

      • One bad relationship: Bad luck.
      • Only bad relationships (especially if you keep getting into the same crappy relationship with different people): The problem is with you, you are subconsciously looking for people like that.

      Check out How we love if you want to know more.

    • MrMakabar@slrpnk.net
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      1 day ago

      Being capable of violence and men being masculine are really hardcore deal breakers /s

      • REDACTED@infosec.pub
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        1 day ago

        I don’t need a gymbro who chases blonde girl next door, I need a responsible man. I don’t need someone who is incapable of managing their emotions and defaults to violence. You saying these are not bad things just proves my point that majority of men are flawed and they themselves think of themselves as husband material, when in reality you’re something useful only at a bar when I feel lonely. You’re probably the type of person that learns women tips from Andrew Tate

        • MrMakabar@slrpnk.net
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          1 day ago

          Insults a form of violence. Emotional violence that is. If I wanted to, I could rather easily insult you. Therefore I am capable of violence. However I did not default to it, because the situation does not call for it.

          You could have replied in whatever way possible to my comment. I did not insult you at all. You however defaulted to insulting me. So unlike me you are not just capable of violence, you default to it.

          That is the difference between being capable of and defaulting to. Hope you get it.

          • REDACTED@infosec.pub
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            1 day ago

            But I was talking about physical violence, not online arguing with a touch of random toxicity. Do you really feel violated? Do you think it’s comparable? I’ve always been verbally brutal, I never claimed I’m perfect myself.