Sorcerer: “I know three spells. I hope one of them is useful.”

Warlock: “My sponsor says to burn things, so I have sixteen different ways to light shit on fire.”

Cleric: “I’m not allowed to cast any spells until someone gets a big boo-boo.”

Wizard:

I am the very model of a modern Arcanologist

I will Divine, then Transmute time, and Conjure cross the Astral Mist

If you’ve got trouble, I’ve a spell that always is the perfect fix

And maximize the casting to eliminate a hint of risk

I’m very well acquainted too, with every skill imagine-ble

Cause high int scores and bonus feats make this class unbelievable

You think I studied hard for this? You’re right cause I’m a dungeon pro

Both in real life and in the game, I am a true professional