Get the best of both worlds with a slide cornet! …basically a trumpet that you jack off instead pushing buttons.

Surgical tech here! …pig gallbladder transplants aren’t a thing. Not a normal thing at least - maybe some obscure experimental surgery tried it once, but nothing’s coming up on a quick web search. Pig skin can be used as a temporary graft over a burn or something; and we use other animal parts like cow veins for vascular grafts. But gallbladders, we just take em out and call it good. Sometimes we don’t take the whole thing, and leave a little pouch so that some function remains, but typically it’s yoinked out and that’s that.

…I’d be willing to burn a week of leave to literally just sleep for 7 days straight.

you wont last long. your best bet is to lay down those arms and come out with your hands up.

…said the Nazi to the Jew.

It’s not so much button mashy vs not; it’s the responsiveness. Take a step back from videogames even: if you were some medieval knight or w/e in a sword fight IRL: your sword is raising as you’re initiating an attack, and you notice your opponent moving his blade toward a vulnerable spot you just left exposed.

So do you just follow through with the attack knowing there’s a blade closing in on your axillary artery, accept your fate, take the blow, bleed out and die? Or, do you abort the attack in favor of a defensive move like lifting your shield or turning a bit so the blade hits your armor instead?

The former is what combat is like in DS (and MH… haven’t tried the others).

It’s unsatisfying flavor of difficulty… again comparable to sabotaging the controls of an otherwise not difficult at all experience (sponge taped to gameboy). Or like… say you need to do the dishes, and up the difficulty of the task by tying a toothbrush to the end of a 5’ stick and scrubbing them with that from the far corner of the kitchen. The task is difficult now, but that doesn’t make it fun, just tedious.

Just pulled up Remnant - I don’t think I’ve ever seen that game before. The Steam pics/vids look pretty great: I’m getting VERY strong Secret World Legends vibes (which is a fantastic game despite having god-awful combat). I’ll throw it on my wishlist and see if I can snag it on a good sale.

‘clunky’ is the end product, but the biggest contributing factor is the absolute committal nature of initiating an animation. Need to take half a step to the left to dodge an arrow? Fuck you, I’m only one second in to a 2.5 second sword twirling animation! …and actually you double clicked at the start of the animation, so I’m gonna do it again for another 2.5 seconds! …so you die, respawn, redo that fight but this time you know when the arrows are coming so you don’t use the long animations. Clear the fight, wooooo you got gud… but trying to dodge arrows and not being able to cuz your character is busy doing a dance routine is some of the least fluid combat I’ve experienced in a videogame. Any keystroke that comes with an animation is always in competition with other keystrokes that have animations.

Combat boils down to memorizing attack patterns and playing a mental macro on repeat until the enemy is dead. There’s no responsiveness from the player, you just die until you know why you’re dying, and tweak the sequence until it works. Eventually the final boss is dead.

I’ve been told that for whatever reason it feels way less clunky on a controller - I’ve only ever played it on a mouse and keyboard.

idk.

Like I said, to each their own. I’m a little jealous of whatever it is the fanbase is feeling when they play those games, but it’s a miss for me.

Any of the Dark Souls. They’re hyped up for being difficult, but the only thing that makes them difficult is the clunky controls.

Like, I could make Pokemon Yellow equally difficult by taping a dish sponge to a Gameboy and requiring the player to operate the buttons through an inch of fluff.

The story’s kinda there if you dig for clues, but it comes off as random bullshit if you don’t.

They are fucking gorgeous, I’ll give em that.

I’ll never understand the ‘git gud’ circlejerk… I 100%'d DS2, and made it a good chunk through Elden Ring (think I was about 80% done before finally saying fuck it). I ‘got gud’… But DS never got fun.

I absolutely love the style, setting, visuals, and music - I really wanted to like DS… but the combat and clunky controls absolutely murder the experience.

For me at least… to each their own.

Professionally, never bitch down or laterally. If you’re going to bitch up, do so in private.

…I think that was from some war movie… Saving Private Ryan? But fuck if it isn’t solid advice!

The good news is we can correct that surgically. The bad news is… well…

8=

Wherever three consenting adults wanna make it happen.

Holy shit, that’s amazing.

POSTED 16 YEARS AGO?? Wasn’t that like… fuckin’ SNES or some shit?? 💀

Yea but I can do that without a robot.

…malevolent? You get the gist of what I’m shooting for.

Well boys, the precedent is set.

*cocks sandwich*

Right? Even if that’s a really suboptimal use of one of those, that’d be a great way to show them off if nothing else.

If I was in the market for one of those things (which… hell no!) and I entered an outlet for them and the first thing I see is a clean floor with one of the little fuckers buzzing around? Fuckin sold. (except hell no)

Seeing a lot of hate for their food… I haven’t been to a subway in probably over a decade (or two, even…), but I don’t remember them being bad. Overpriced maybe, but once the sub is actually in your hands it’s alright, isn’t it?

Or did they enshittify since then? …actually stupid question, every fucking fast food chain has enshittified since then.

Elon’s got quite the tricep workout figured out.

In this context, all good = the complete absence of evil.

The blame for culpability in the Trump regime’s rise to power falls onto many different people and groups that absolutely includes the voters.

She was a fantastic choice -and here’s the important part- compared to Trump.

Without that contrast, she was shit. Our options were a spoonful of shit vs a mountain of shit. The DNC is responsible for running a spoonful of shit, but the voters are responsible for choosing the mountain.

Should the DNC run people who aren’t shit? YES. Please, yes. But that’s not what we got.

All the rights we’ve lost under Trump, the economic collapse he’s causing, the deaths he enthusiastically did nothing to prevent in Ukraine/Gaza, the families that have been torn apart by ICE… the voters could have stopped that. The voters chose to let it happen.

Is there a lesson to be learned here? Yeah. Several. Will that lesson actually stick where we need it to (to the DNC)? Lol fuck no. The DNC won’t learn shit until we break out the guillotines. But in the meantime, we the voters need to be more strategic with our resources, which includes decision making like deliberately stepping on a turd if that puts us on a path around the mountain of shit.